Friday 24 May 2013

New dictionary entries

Some of these are so brilliant. I love the play on words.

Adult: A person who has stopped growing at both ends and is now growing in the middle.

Beauty parlour: A place where women curl up and dye.

Cannibal: Someone who is fed up with people.

Chickens: The only animals you eat before they are born and after they are dead.

Committee: A body that keeps minutes and wastes hours.

Dust: Mud with the juice squeezed out.

Egotist: Someone who is usually me-deep in conversation.

Handkerchief: Cold storage.

Inflation: Cutting money in half without damaging the paper.

Mosquito: An insect that makes you like flies better.

Raisin: Grape with sunburn.

Secret: Something you tell to one person at a time.

Skeleton: A bunch of bones with the person scraped off.

Toothache: The pain that drives you to extraction.

Tomorrow: One of the greatest labour-saving devices of today.

Yawn: An honest opinion openly expressed.

Wrinkles: Something other people have, similar to my character lines.

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